Top ten list of people that pissed me off, cost me money, or just made me laugh this year:

10.     Terrelle Pryor, OSU Football: TP said Northwestern’s defense made him feel like he was throwing against a high school secondary. So unnecessarily hurtful, besides if he thought that was bad he shoulda seen us last year. The Buckeye signal-caller might not be a freshman anymore, but that doens’t mean we can throw away the Dandy’s diaper, somethings gonna need to collect all the shit he talks.   

9.     Lauren Delaney, Northwestern Softball: This Wildcats wild-armed pitcher serves up more body-shots than a bartender in Cancun. In fact, I think she just got a new nickname.

8.     Joe Tiller: After eleven remarkable (or at least respectable) years prowling the Purdue sidelines, Joe Tiller’s great finale to walk out to the 50 yard line of Ross-Ade Stadium and……. taking a dump? Least that’s certainly what it felt like. In his final season the Boilers went 4-8, he feuded with his extremely talented QB, and he really seemed to just sleep walk through the entire season. 

7.    Tom Crean, Indiana Basketball: No one will ever be able to convince me this guy didn’t intentionally throw his first season in Bloomington. He ran off all of Kelvin Sampson’s players except for little used Kyle Taber (none of whom had committed a serious NCAA infraction). Then just when it seemed like his team was getting it together and might finish strong, he suspends his best player. Why on earth would he sabotage an entire season? Cuz next year the Hoosiers can win 4 conference games, instead of the 1 victory he notched this year, and everyone will cheer and say “look at ol’ Creenie he’s really pulling it together.” Had he kept Sampson’s players the Hoosiers faithful would have expected Indiana to challenge for a title within one year. Kinda genius actually.

6.    Brent Metcalf, Iowa Wrestling: This happened last week right after Metcalf lost the national title to Darrion Caldwell. Don’t get me wrong Caldwell is arguably the bigger boner, but he aint in the B10. 

5.     Bill Lynch, Indiana Football: Everyone was impressed when he took Indiana to its first bowl game in 15 years, but then he followed it up by pissing me off in 09. He suspends his star quarterback for four months at the beginning of spring practice for undisclosed reasons, which basically doomed the Hoosiers 09 campaign. Problem is, those reasons are still undisclosed. I’m sorry if what he did was so bad it was worth saying damn the whole season, I need to know what it was, otherwise I’m forced to assume you are a petty asshole. Which is what I did. 

4.    Anthony Tucker, Iowa Basketball: Prior to his suspension for nearly drinking himself to death and passing out behind an Iowa City dumpster Tucker was the Hawkeyes leading scorer and his team was 7-2. After the incident the Hawkeyes went 8-15. Worse yet for Tucker, his duchebagery paved the way for Jake Kelly to grab the reins of this team for next year.  

3.     Evan Turner, OSU Basketball: Yes he was probably the best all-around player in the league this year. But the man’s propensity to turn the ball over cost me at least $200 in gambling losses and the Buckeyes three W’s. I was at the OSU-NU game in which he was dubbed Evan Turnover for his incessant over-dribbling. I liked it, its his new name. 

2.     Athlon Magazine, douche bag season preview: You told me B.J. Mullens was going to be the third best big man in the country. Somewhere between Blake Griffin and Hasheem Thabeet. He wasn’t even the third best freshman big man. Damn you Athlon, damn you like you damned my college fantasy basketball season….

1.    Rich Rodriguez: Michigan is my hometown team, and I’ll always have love for Big Blue, but this guy… I just don’t like this guy. I only have the circumstantial evidence to convict him of being a huge boner. But when a second generation Wolverine (Justin Boren) transfers to hated OSU because of what your doing to the program, something has gone terribly wrong.